Sunday, February 7, 2010

Boy D for Douche

So here's the story of me and Boy D. He's boy d because he's a douche.

Me and Boy D kind of meet online, but we have mutual friends. Whatever. We started hanging out Bonfire remembrance night 2008. We hit it off, like completely. He was always over at my apartment etc. I fell in love with this boy. Oh and he was 25 when we met, I was 18. But come to find out he's really 12 inside. On with the story. Anyways, this goes on and on for about 6 months. Then I give up on him, because he wouldn't define us, and I hated that fact. So we stop talking for a month or so, then guess who comes back in my life, yeah Boy D. WTF. Of course me, being the stupid 19 year old I was at this point, I am like oh I'll get him back and we'll date and yadda yadda. Well by this point he's moved back to Dallas, and works for some company that flies him all over the world to build stuff. This past summer he was in Portugal for most of it. I didn't know this, until we started emailing back and forth. We start talking about marriage, and kids, and a house, and yadda yadda. Like legit stuff. Like I would marry that boy tomorrow. I keep going back to him, after he's made it clear through his actions he's not going to be permanent with me. I'm blind to this fact. Anyways, by this point it's July and we're still emailing back and forth, granted I haven't actually seen him in well over 9 months. But yet we still talk and he still likes me and misses me. Fast forward to the fall, I start school, our talking becomes sparse and eventually dries up from September to November.
Ring Day 2009, I get a text message from Boy D "Congrats to everyone getting their rings!" I texted him back "BOY D!! (I said his name) you're in town?!" He said yes, and we proceeded to discuss meeting up and hanging out. So we establish that we're going to hang out. So I meet him at Best Buy, it's super late by this point, and I see him and all those feelings of hatred for not talking to me leave, and the feeling of love comes back in. I get out of my car and it's like the movies, no joke. He lit up when he saw me, as did I. We kiss, like we always do, and we're back to us. Holding hands, making out, you know all that mushy stuff. So we end up staying with each other all night. It was the most amazing night ever. I completely fell back in love with him, as if I ever fell out. Anyways, he left and we still talked all the time, then the next week or so I ask him if we really had a future and he told me no and my heart broke. Completely. Like I was in a meeting for work when we were texting, and I lost it right there. I was completely heartbroken, a year of my life went to that boy. Waiting for him, hoping he'd want to be with me. Again I was blind by my love for him, he never had the intention of really dating and being with me. Stupid love.
So after that fiasco, we talk here and there, but I come to the realization I need to let myself go. So I slowly start fading him away, and stop talking to him etc. Well last night guess who's effing online and we start talking? Yup you guessed it, Boy D. I was telling him we went to Aaron Watson and I looked good and he said "send me a picture." So of course I did, he told me I looked good. Here we go again, right? Well tonight he's like I need time. Time for what? You're the one who fucking broke up with me. So that's what our conversation ended, because I know if I see him we'll kiss, and be all mushy mushy, which shouldn't happen. So I asked him what would happen, and he said "IDK I need time." WTF. You should say, I wouldn't let it happen. Like who says that? He's clearly a douche, and I clearly deserve better.

So Boy D: I'm done with you forever. I have no hope that you'll like me. I'm done. I strongly dislike you and I hope you realize that you let a girl who loved you go, a girl who would've done anything for you. Here's to you Boy D the douche. I hate you.

I'm going to start labeling my posts now :)

I completed another 101 in 1001!! Saw another movie alone!! WHOOP!

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